It’s amazing what you can miss when you shun TV, papers and the internet for just a week. Had I accessed any of the above I would have whooped with delight at the idea of Radovan Karadzic, spending the rest of his life continually dropping his soap; I would have been utterly dismayed at the loss of Glasgow East. However, I am sorry I missed what must have been the biggest story of the past week: proof that The King is immortal.
Look at this carving. The features, the swept back hair and the quiff are unmistakably those of Elvis but the carving of the King was created around 1800 years before his appearance on the Ed Sullivan show. The amazing likeness has come to light as part of a sale of ancient antiques by the auction house Bonhams. The Roman Elvis is an acroterion - an architectural ornament often found on the corners of sarcophagi - and forms part of a collection owned by Melbourne-based Graham Geddes - one of the world's most foremost collectors - which is estimated to sell for more than £1m when it goes on sale in October. The Elvis sculpture is 2nd Century AD and is estimated to make £25,000 to £30,000.
A spokesman for Bonhams said: "It is perhaps the strangest item in the sale and it clearly proof positive that Elvis lived a previous life in Rome. It certainly allows Roman experts to make sense of references in the Annals of Tacitus to a singer called Gyratus who sang popular songs including Tenere Me Ama, Non Adamare Non Possum and Nunc hic aut numquam. Unfortunately I am not sure we will ever determine whether Elvis is a reincarnation of Gyratus or if indeed he is immortal. Then again some things should remain within the realms of faith”