21 November 2011

Lt Pike - Nutrition Advocate

 This image of Lt John Pike pepper spraying  students at UC Davis is set to be one of the iconic images of  of the Occupy protests. While nobody is getting murdered a la Kent State, the casual sadism of his act makes on question the fundamental role of the police in the United States. But perhaps a new ruling by the US Department of Agriculture casts his actions into a totally different light

The US Congress and the Department of Agriculture have collectively agreed that pepper spray should now be recognized as a member of the vegetable food group.

With this declaration, pepper spray now joins the ranks of carrots, arugula, chickpeas, and broccoli as an official FDA-approved vegetable.

Pepper spray’s popularity saw an unprecedented spike since the Occupy Wall Street demonstrations began in New York City’s Zuccotti Park in September. These mostly peaceful protests sparked a wider ‘Occupy’ movement that has had demonstrators globally consuming more pepper spray than ever before in part due to the help of riot control officers.

“We are super excited to have pepper spray join the vegetable family,” said UC Davis chief of police Gordon Toothrot. “Now, when we’re violently breaking up these peaceful protests with brutal, unnecessary force, we’re also providing people with a vital aspect of their daily nutrition.”

Well there you have it. Lt Pike was not being sadistic, rahter he was showing zeal in ensuring that hungry students get sufficient nutrition, Well that has me concinced.. Give the man a medal... Well maybe not, perhaps dismissal and a humungous lawsuit is in order


susan said...

It's really a control device used casually to make people who might consider protesting stay at home to eat their pizza - which has also recently been declared a vegetable.

jams o donnell said...

I think you are right Susan!

Sean Jeating said...

"Mr. Pike certainly is just doing his duty" I heard Tetrapilotomos mutter, and: "A swastika would suit him even better than a star."

SnoopyTheGoon said...

Yeah: could you put some of that spray on my sandwich, officer?

Can't say I have been identifying with the Occupiers, but even less with the police... oh well.

jams o donnell said...

Sadly so Sean.

Whether you support the protests or not the police have acted dreadfully