28 October 2010

My new career will not be plumbing

As luck would have it the toilet stopped wanting to flush just as I have the time actually to attend to it promptly (and not in a few weeks or months as is my usual timescale). The diagnosis was quite simple thanks to the internet. The diaphragm on the siphon was damaged

So off I trot to B&Q for a new siphon. I manage to find the plumbing aisle withing 15 minutes of looking and I manage to pay for it using one of those satanic self check out things, even though it initially rejected every single note I had on me.

After much swearing and wd40, the cistern was detached, the old siphon removed, the new one hammered into place and the cistern replaced )Note to self. Hell will freeze over if I ever use one of those blue blocks again. They form a vile sludge at the bottom of the cistern and it will be ages before I can remove the bloody stains off my hands!).

Surprisingly the not-wife is pleased that I at least tried and stuck wit it...

All would have been well had I not forgotten to replace the big rubber uberwasher thingy that seals the gap between the cistern and the business part of the toilet so off it all came again. This time I had the bright Idea of emptying the cistern more speedily if I undid the overflow pipe. This would have worked I hadn't damaged the seal creating a nice steady leak around the pipe....

So back to B&Q and a new overflow pipe set was purchased which I managed to re fit with some cursing and after three goes I have a toilet that flushes and doesn't spill water onto the bathroom floor .

Somehow I think I can put plumbing on to the list of new career path along with gigolo (except for short sigted women or bears how have lost all self respect), proffesional footballer, prima ballerina and Secretary General of the UN....

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

Watch where you go with your blue fingers. Makes you look like you have voted in the Iraqi elections. Dangerous.

jams o donnell said...

I voted ten times by looks of it Andrew!

susan said...

I hope you're among that lucky minority who have more than one loo available.

Bryan said...

I had to check the 'Net because your toilet is nothing like the standard US type.

Changing the valve in a US "flapper" toilet takes about ten minutes and only involves two nuts. The cistern/tank stays in place.

Your system is designed with a plumber in mind, i.e. a service call for a plumber. Replacing an entire toilet is less trouble than changing that siphon valve.

Good on ya, Jams.

Knatolee said...

Plumbing, NO THANKS! This summer we had a catastrophic toilet overflow. We called the plumber. I hate toilets. Good for you for giving it the old college try!

jams o donnell said...

Sadly not Susan, much use was made of a bucket to act in place of the flush!

Thanks Bryan. I did think of putting in a new system but I decided not to tempt fate

Ah I had to do it. I'm shite at DY but I have to try Knatolee!

SnoopyTheGoon said...

Plumbing is a tightly kept circle of real world dictators, Jams. Getting into it promises a lot.

jams o donnell said...

The Brotherhood of plumbers is strictly controlled by the Andorrans. The initiation rights are gruesome!

Liz Hinds said...

Plumbing is top of Husband's Hate List. Never the right tools and you have to bend into ridiculous angles to reach anything. And nothing ever fits etc etc ...

Well done you for trying!

jams o donnell said...

Even something as relatively simply as the siphon was a bugger Liz. At least I got it right eventually!

CherryPie said...

Well at least you got there in the end :-)

jams o donnell said...

Third time lucky anyway!