According to a study released Wednesday by the California Pain Medicine Center, subjects suffering from male- pattern baldness were found to experience a level of physical pain at least seven times more intense than that experienced by women during childbirth.
"Clinical studies show that as hair gradually separates from the scalp, men experience intensifying waves of all-consuming pain equivalent to having their insides ripped out through the thousands of tiny follicles on their head," said Vincent Kwan, who led the all-male research team that carried out the study. "While strong uterine contractions and tearing of the vaginal walls undoubtedly cause a degree of discomfort among women in labor, balding men would give anything to experience those sensations instead of lying awake and suffering all night as their hair thins."
Kwan stated that men's remarkable ability to endure years of excruciating agony without the aid of epidurals or other powerful analgesics was a testament to the sex's unrivaled tolerance for pain....
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Well the truth according to the Onion anyway!
"Clinical studies show that as hair gradually separates from the scalp, men experience intensifying waves of all-consuming pain equivalent to having their insides ripped out through the thousands of tiny follicles on their head," said Vincent Kwan, who led the all-male research team that carried out the study. "While strong uterine contractions and tearing of the vaginal walls undoubtedly cause a degree of discomfort among women in labor, balding men would give anything to experience those sensations instead of lying awake and suffering all night as their hair thins."
Kwan stated that men's remarkable ability to endure years of excruciating agony without the aid of epidurals or other powerful analgesics was a testament to the sex's unrivaled tolerance for pain....
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Well the truth according to the Onion anyway!
6 comments:
Bloody hell! I should've had an epidural of the head every night for the last 15 years! What a brave trooper I really am. I'll at the very least get a laughing gas cylinder installed by my bedside now.
You and me both Andrew. Women just do not understand our pain!
You guys ARE a pain, bless your hearts...:)
We are indeed!
He he... the truth will out, even if via the Onion!
Many a true word spoken in jest mon ami!
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